Not Feeling it

Dear UncleGary,

My best friend just confessed they’re in love with me. I love them too, but not like that. Do I tell the truth or let them believe there’s hope?

Signed, Not Feeling it

Dear Not Feeling It,

First off, this is one of those moments that calls for courage. Not the loud kind, but the quiet kind, the kind that shows up when you look someone you care about in the eye and tell the truth, even when it’s uncomfortable. Because love, in any form, deserves honesty. It deserves respect. And it deserves clarity.

Now, I know it’s tempting to soften the blow, to leave a little door cracked open. But that’s not kindness, it’s confusion dressed up in good intentions. If you care about this person, and it sounds like you do, then the most loving thing you can do is be clear. Not cruel. Not cold. Just clear.

“You’re not auditioning for a rom-com, you’re starring in a very special episode of ‘Boundaries Are Beautiful!’ So go ahead, be honest, be gentle, and maybe throw in a hug or a weird dance move if it helps lighten the mood. But don’t let them build a castle on a cloud. You’re not the villain here. You’re the friend who chose truth over comfort.

And that, my friend, is a beautiful kind of love.

Sincerely Uncle Gary